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Thread: Feel very lost

  1. #11
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    I understand everyone's point of view "stick at it" etc etc however having been in your position since I started phase 2 (I didn't drop out because of my tie in clause) why stay and do something that makes you miserable? If you don't like it now, it doesn't make any sense to do it for the next 2.5years that's a long time during which you could start training in a field you really do feel passionate about and can see yourself working in forever.

    Basically my advice is this, if you don't like it now it doesn't really get any better, as I go away every time I hate it and that feeling has not disappeared yet and I'm nearing on phase 5. So if you're not liking it now, leave before its too late, go and do something more enjoyable and something that has more job prospects at the end.

  2. #12
    I disagree with the above post as you rarely know if you like anything experiencing once. We have similar situation in my current area.....i say you need to stick out your probation period to k ow if its really not for you

  3. #13

    Engine Cadet
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    Can you be more specific about what you didn't like? Was it home sickness, or lack of socialising out side of work or what? It might be something the folks on here can give you tips on to make better if you do go back.

    I also think it's only fair to say there's a possibility you go back, and it's worse than what it sounds like you've experienced, i.e. 3 months of cleaning and a crew that really don't care about you.

    Speaking from experience don't let having no plan B keep you being miserable, will be easy enough to get a temporary job while you think about a career. if this was your dream job I doubt you've given it a proper think, plus knowing what you didnt like is great experience for finding what you do.
    Good luck whatever you decide!

  4. #14

    Deck Officer (CoC: Chief Mate)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I understand everyone's point of view "stick at it" etc etc however having been in your position since I started phase 2 (I didn't drop out because of my tie in clause) why stay and do something that makes you miserable? If you don't like it now, it doesn't make any sense to do it for the next 2.5years that's a long time during which you could start training in a field you really do feel passionate about and can see yourself working in forever.

    Basically my advice is this, if you don't like it now it doesn't really get any better, as I go away every time I hate it and that feeling has not disappeared yet and I'm nearing on phase 5. So if you're not liking it now, leave before its too late, go and do something more enjoyable and something that has more job prospects at the end.
    This is fair enough and if you really really don't like it and are 100% sure you don't want to do this for a career (or anything else remotely related to the shipping industry) and you want to go and train in something completely different and never look at a ship again then by all means sack it off.

    HOWEVER because of the way the funding works if you were to do that then you can't ever do a cadetship again, you can't go back and pick up where you left off so by quitting you are effectively closing the door forever on the career. A quick search on here will show multiple posts from people who quit halfway through their cadetship then realised they had made a mistake and wanted to get back into it and are now discovering that this is virtually impossible. There is someone from my phase who has been trying to get back into it for the last 4 years (without really getting anywhere as far as I know). That's the reason I would advising finishing the course and getting the COC (and HND, FD or whatever other associated qualification you are going for).

  5. #15

    Engineer Officer (CoC: Chief)
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    I hated my first trip as a cadet to the point where I could barely get out of bed in the mornings.

    Went back for my second trip as I couldn't see any other option and had a much better experience.

    The tasks that you should be doing should improve as you gain experience, which should hopefully improve things a bit for you.

    Life at sea is not for everyone, you may go back and decide that it really isn't what you want, but we see people on here all the time who regret leaving a cadetship half way through and ask if there is any wau back and the sad truth is that there isn't.

    Unless finishing the cadetship would harm your mental health then I wouls urge you to stick it out.

    Good luck and please feel free to PM me if you need to discuss anything more confidential.

  6. The following user says Thank You to Clanky for this useful post:

    endure (19th May 2017)

  7. #16

    Deck Officer (CoC: Master)
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    I'd also like to disagree with some points on post #11, in that if you haven't got a plan B and you can handle the time away then just stick at it. I would challenge anyone to say they didn't consider quitting at some stage of the training, you will have good and bad trips, but ultimately whether you intend to stay at sea or not the qualifications can open some doors and give you opportunities you may not have otherwise considered. I know someone who qualified, then spent 15 years another career, decided to move back to the maritime industry and was able to secure an amazing opportunity in VTS.

  8. #17

    Parent
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    If you don't have a plan B which would be very wise to have in place if you decide to leave, also worth considering if you were to leave and wanted to pursue anything that involves a degree there is the student loan cost. If you stick it out at least you then have something towards another qualification and it hasn't cost you. Unless you rely on Labour winning the next election and removing student loans that is.
    I'd stay for a while longer with an open mind.

  9. #18

    Engineer Officer (CoC: EOOW)
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    In an element of disagreement with #11 and agreement with Clanky:

    As a cadet you don't see the true reward of the job, that at the end of the day we are all here for: equal time off and lots of tax free money. It makes a difference to most of us when we get our first job, to have a lot of time off and 1000s every month to spend.

    But the best message on here thus far is from Clanky: do not continue if it will affect your mental health.

  10. #19

    Engineer Officer (CoC: EOOW)
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    Sound advice from that guy (or girl you can never tell) Clanky. If there is any senior Officers on the ship you trust you can talk to them as well i'm sure they would understand.

  11. #20
    Unregistered
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    I actually agree with the post above to go and do something else if you hate it. I actually liked my first trip but every trip after has been worse and worse. I'm not even on a cruise ship but cargo where it seems people no longer talk to each other and sit silently at dinner before disappearing into their cabin to struggle with **** (no) internet. I totally wish I had been brave enough to go with my instincts after my first year and drop out. Sometimes admitting to yourself and your friends/family that you got it wrong and want to try something else is actually the braver thing to do than to stick it out. I also think that if you hate what you're doing you're probably not going to be very good at your job either. Anyway, just another view to balance things out!

 

 

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