Feel very lost

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Thread: Feel very lost

  1. #1

    Feel very lost

    Hi guys,

    I know we get these sort of threads all the time and i never thought id be next to write one but here goes!

    I'm a phase 2 cadet (18 years old) with cruise ships and I have just finished 3 months onboard and I have two weeks at home before I have to leave again for three months.
    I was treat really well onboard, the Officers were mostly lovely and I was given fair work on the ship as a cadet.
    However I was really unhappy onboard. After two weeks I could have easily come home but I wanted to stick it out to the three months to see if maybe it was just to settle in, but now I'm home I feel just the same.
    I really don't want to go on the next ship but I have no plan B either and I just feel really stuck, and I don't have much time to make a decision.
    I would love to work with cruise ships still from shoreside but I'm not sure what to do.

    This career was honestly a dream come true when i got the job last year so its been very crushing to my morale.
    Thanks for any advice or scolding or whatever aha

  2. #2

    Retired Radio Officer
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Three months is not long enough to decide on your life's work. Going to sea as an 18 year old is quite a shock to the system and at first it will feel strange. Give it some time and stick it out till the end of your cadetship. By then you'll know whether it is for you or not. Don't give up yet.
    io parlo morse

  3. #3

    Deck Officer (CoC: Chief Mate)
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Stick it out and get your coc. You may well change your mind after another couple of trips but if not, having a coc will mean that you will have a much better chance of an office based job in the cruise industry.

  4. #4

    Engineer Officer (CoC: EOOW)
    Join Date
    March 2013
    You should'nt see it as weakness, every single one of us will have gone through this at some point! Maybe now you are at home go and see what most of your friends are doing now with their lives... Just remember what you are working towards even if you are struggling to adapt.

  5. #5

    Aspiring Deck Cadet
    Join Date
    March 2017
    I am not yet a cadet so I can't really comment from that side of things, however I have spent lots of time away from home due to my current job. I am 26 with 2 kids and tbh it kills me every time I have to go away, as the guys have said above we all go through it, even people on land that have to spend time away. Also like above my trick is remembering why I am doing it and for me, currently, it is my kids. When I am back I try to spend as much time with them as possible, so that when I leave again I feel refreshed and ready to go. Try and find you own thing to remind yourself of why your doing this.

    Please dont give up on this, take it from me, ok I am not that old however I am just starting to try and live my dream of working at sea. Your 18 years old which is just the beginning of you adult/work life, try not to make any rash decision which you may later regret and end up going back and starting all over again when your older.

  6. #6

    Engineer Officer (CoC: EOOW)
    Join Date
    July 2011
    It does get better as you grow older, it's hard being young and being away. Eventually it just becomes that part of your life, three months will end up feeling quick and your time off will end up feeling long.

    Plus when you've completed the cadetship you can work somewhere else shoreside, shorter trips or anything! You'll have qualifications to help you.

    You're not the first, you're not the last, you're one of many of us who feel like this at some point in our chosen vocation.

  7. #7

    Deck Officer (CoC: Master)
    Join Date
    April 2011
    I didn't really enjoy my first trip at sea that much and wasn't that thrilled going for my second trip, but strangely during the second trip I really started to enjoy the job and by the third trip was hooked. I do think the cadetship is the hardest part overall and once you are qualified it changes all over again.
    Life is an adventure so even if you don't have a plan B at the moment, carry on with what you are doing, make the most of the experiences and then perhaps once you have your OOW ticket decide then what is next and at least with your qualifications you will have something that you can take forward with you even if you change careers completely.

  8. #8

    Deck Officer (CoC: OOW)
    Join Date
    November 2011
    What I found about my first trip was that I also thought I enjoyed it after signing off and that everyone treated me nicely etc. But looking back and thinking about it, it was a pretty rubbish trip compare to the next 13. Get back on board, you'll be a lot more familiar with your surroundings, you'll have more initiative, you'll be more involved, busier, time will pass quicker and you'll start to learn what it's actually like and you'll just grow into it.

    Keep at it.

  9. #9

    Deck Officer (CoC: OOW)
    Join Date
    December 2010
    I never really enjoyed being away for a long time not so much home sick as boredom. But now am work on a ferry 2 weeks on and off. There are options if you stick it out

  10. #10

    Engineer Officer (CoC: EOOW)
    Join Date
    April 2014

    You got this! Without a plan B, i would suggest staying where you are as you might regret it later. You have to think about your expectations of what the job is really about. I mean, you could leave and end up doing something even less enjoyable. I think alot of the time, you get out what you put in so best to just be positive and see what happens. If you want to work with cruise ships, even shore side, then obtaining the CoC will put you in good place for that in the future.




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